There are big changes coming in my life. On the one hand I’m excited and on the other, I’m freaking out! Hubby got a new job 400 miles away. We don’t have a place to live yet and he starts work tomorrow. He is staying with family who live a mile from the job. I’m staying back home until we find a new place.
I meditate. I visualize. I say affirmations to calm my nerves, but that darned ego keeps popping it’s annoying head into my thoughts. I know better than to listen to it but I’m still a work in progress. If I think about it, change is happening all the time. People come and go. Nothing is permanent. But we humans seem to fight against it. We like routines, even when we know they might not be good for us.
I know my happiness is an inside job. There will always be bumps along the road of life and I have to learn to accept and deal with them. I can’t allow myself to be happy only if events are going my way, or at least what I perceive are going my way. Sometimes things not working out is really what’s best for my higher self (my life path). Not everything I want is good for me and sometimes hindsight makes that clearer. I know that intellectually, but the emotional part of me needs to catch up.
The good thing about studying Buddhism and spirituality is, I am now aware of my crazy, negative thoughts. I know that 99% of what I waste time worrying about never come true. I just end up wasting precious time. I could spend my time be grateful.
Our new life is a good thing. It’s something we have talked about for years and since neither of us are getting younger, now is the time to go for it.
Everyday I wake up and have my day planned but there’s always something unexpected that comes up and my plans change. The future is the same way. We move forward through the unknown and “Trust” that all will be good.